Editor’s Note: Article includes graphic sexual content.
There’s really nothing glamorous about the race to the gutter in the women’s magazine world. Not to be out-done by Cosmopolitan Magazine, which in the past has brought us gems such as “The 2014 Sex Olympics” [1] and “Holiday Sextacular,” [2]Glamour Magazine’s most recent issue now takes us down a new avenue of filth with it’s “8 Crucial Do’s and Don’ts of Anal Sex.” Really.
Glamour Magazine describes itself as the magazine “for the woman who sets the direction of her own life and lives it to its fullest and chicest.” The magazine boasts an audience of 12.2 Million readers (and that’s just the print audience) and claims 1 in 8 women “Engage with Glamour” [3] because, “With Glamour, she looks her best and does her best every day, every night and everywhere.” So of course that extends to the bedroom too.
Emily Morse, self-described “sexologist” for Glamour, told readers that 1 in 3 women have explored anal sex. She calls it an “acquired taste” which, “like any experimental dish—it all depends on the cook, the preparation, and your mind-set.”
Anal sex, Morse said, is the “new frontier of sex” and “more women are opening up to it than ever.” Which is, readers are to assume, really super, except that in our puritanical society nobody talks about it. “Say the phrase ‘anal sex’ in a room full of women and watch each one refuse to talk about it ...” Hypocrites and prigs, of course.
The article goes into some extremely vulgar details on the 8 tips Morse thinks are most important and “helpful” in making the taboo act something more women should try. Thankfully, Glamour shies away from the colorful illustrations and cartoon figures that Cosmo employs to illustrate its sex tips. But the words are graphic enough:
- Lubrication: Explaining in graphic detail that too much is not enough because that particular passage doesn’t “naturally produce any sort of lubricant.”
- Sexual Position: Morse lists the top three positions that would make the experience more enjoyable for what she calls “backdoor newbie’s.”
- Taking it Slow and Breathing: Advising against “diving right in” since staying loose and relaxed is key
- Being Vocal: Surprisingly, Morse doesn’t mean all that grunting and moaning stuff (Thank goodness!), instead she tells the woman “it is your job to pay attention to what you are feeling, and communicate this to your partner. If something feels uncomfortable or painful, it’s up to you to let him know.” Etc…
The last bit of “helpful” advise she leaves us with is this, “If the idea of diving into anal play with no lifeguard on duty still sends shivers down your back side, it’s OK! You don't have to do anything you don't want to do.” Still, if you want to be a woman who “lives life to the fullest and chicest …”