The Real Radio Hatemongers

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Conservatives Are Baby-Eating Nazis

Republican Congresswoman Would Have Enjoyed the Holocaust

“I sometimes wonder what people think in this country, when they send someone like, oh, for example, Michele Bachmann to Congress. She represents a district in Minnesota, she’s a Republican of course, and she’s a hatemonger. She’s the type of person that would have gladly rounded up the Jews in Germany and shipped them off to death camps. She’s the type of person who would have had no problem sending typhoid-smeared blankets to Native American families awaiting deportation to reservations. She’s the type of person that I’m sure believes that the use of Agent Orange in Vietnam was good, and the use of depleted uranium in Iraq served a purpose. This is an evil bitch from Hell. I mean, just an absolute evil woman.”
— Mike Malloy, The Mike Malloy Show, October 17, 2008. [MP3 audio]

Dick Cheney Eats Babies

“[Former Vice President Dick] Cheney, by the way looks very ruddy; I couldn’t get over that, like, he must have feasted on a Jewish baby, or a Muslim baby. He must have sent his people out to get one and bring it back so he could drink its blood, because that’s, you know, that’s what somebody like Cheney does to get that ruddy look....The weird part — there were no dribbles of blood down his tux, but it was very clear that he had been eating the blood of either a Jewish or a Muslim baby; he wouldn’t eat a Christian baby. If he ate the blood of a Christian baby, I — there’s something in the old writings that said that instantly the trap door to Hell opens and you disappear into the smoke.”
— Mike Malloy, The Mike Malloy Show, October 22, 2009. [MP3 audio]

“Cheney has had five heart attacks, and history of heart trouble — well, I guess they’re one and the same. The cause of his latest health problem is not clear. I think I know. (long pause) He’s done too much cannibalism, drunk too many cups of blood! Cheney’s in the hospital. Ah, the first good news all day....I’m not going to feel anything but intense gratitude that this miserable bastard has finally stepped off this earthly coil! Really!...Cheney is a murderer. He’s a killer. He’s a torturer. He is evil personified! He is a walking mass of horror and when he’s gone, this planet will be cleaner!”
— Mike Malloy on The Mike Malloy Show, June 25, 2010. [MP3 audio]

Fred Barnes Eats Babies

“[The Weekly Standard’s] Fred Barnes — this guy is beyond crazy. I’m sure he eats children’s arms and legs for afternoon snacks. This guy is insane.”
— Mike Malloy, The Mike Malloy Show, January 30, 2008. [MP3 audio]

Wanting Fox Hosts Beaten With Baseball Bats

Host Ed Schultz: “Speaking of sports, [Fox News hosts Bill] O’Reilly, [Glenn] Beck and Geraldo [Rivera] go to a Yankees game this weekend and somehow they ended up in the front row. How in the heck did they ever manage that, Steph?”
Radio host Stephanie Miller: “Ah, Ed. You know if ever there was a time I wish the Yankees would bring back Bat Day, and give a bunch of drunken New Yorkers bats, that would have been the day.”
— Exchange on MSNBC’s The Ed Show, July 23, 2010.

Conservative Republicans = Mass Suicide Cult

Announcer: “The following is a paid advertisement from Republicans for Mitt Romney, or mass suicide. If John McCain is the Republican Presidential nominee, it will destroy the Republican Party. We’re Romney supporters and we know. Because, if you vote for John McCain, we’re going to go on a killing rampage. Hey, better dead than moderate.”
Republican Character Voice: “Look, I for one don’t want to die in a hail of gunfire from crazed Mitt Romney supporters, but it’s better than nominating a man who opposed the Bush tax cuts. Hell, John McCain spent years in a North Vietnamese prison. A prison! That doesn’t make him a hero. That makes him an ex-con.”
Announcer: “Exactly, and um, you know what men do in prison. You see, if John McCain is President, he’ll make sodomy mandatory. Now, Mitt Romney, well, he believes all sex should be outlawed.”
Second Republican Character: “As a true Republican, I’m prepared to poison my own children if John McCain is the nominee, but I do wish there was another way.”
Announcer: “There is. If Mitt Romney is the nominee, he’ll give everyone a free new car, made by people in Michigan, with company-paid health care and pensions just like 1955. If John McCain is the nominee, well, we are going to kill everybody, then turn the guns on ourselves. So choose wisely this election day. This has been a paid ad from Republicans for Mitt Romney, or [sound of gun being cocked] mass suicide.”
— Parody commercial aired on Air America’s Randi Rhodes Show, February 5, 2008. [MP3 audio]

“Pig” Limbaugh Would Like It If All Children Starved

“If Limbaugh had his way, hungry kids would remain hungry kids, period. They can starve to death. Limbaugh is a filthy, disgusting personification of predatory capitalism at its worst. He’s just a filthy beast. I don’t understand how this woman who married him, how does she get in bed with this slob? I mean, how do you do that? How does she sit across a dinner table from him? Uhhh — never mind!...Can you believe that this society produced a filthy human being like that? A society that has in its element, corporate America that determines this pig — this pig is worth $50 million a year. That’s 1 million a week! This filthy dehumanized pig is worth that? I get him when the lights are out, he’s mine, there’s no question about that! None!”
— Mike Malloy on The Mike Malloy Show, June 17, 2010. [MP3 audio]

Rush Limbaugh, Wife Beater?

“I’m guessing that the White House advisor on domestic violence will never say that beating your wife is OK, which may be a disappointment to Rush Limbaugh. And you wonder why this guy can’t stay married...”
— Ron Reagan, Jr. on The Ron Reagan Show, June 29, 2009. [MP3 audio]

Rush Limbaugh Serves Satan

“That Rush Limbaugh, that guy, I have to say — there’s another fat bastard that I opened up the door for, huh? It really, it really makes me mad because, um, he, he goes and — like, I opened up the channel for fat funny guys, I really did, that were blue collar and populist or whatever. He took the blue collar and, like, totally went the wrong way with it. So, he is taking my mojo and, like, using it for satanic forces, and I just don’t like it when people are working for Satan instead of God. I don’t like that.”
— Roseanne Barr guest hosting Air America’s American Afternoon, May 1, 2008. [MP3 audio]

Rush Limbaugh = Hitler

Host Ed Schultz: “It’s kind of like the way Rush brought it to CPAC over the weekend, about how, you know, how interesting he was.”
Clip of Rush Limbaugh at CPAC, accompanied by audio of Adolf Hitler and cheering Nazis: “I want Barack Obama to fail if his mission is to restructure and reform this country so that capitalism and individual liberty are not its foundation. Why would I want that to succeed?”...
Schultz: “Now if you watch Limbaugh with the sound down, the drugster, he looks like Adolf Hitler! His animation is amazing! It’s, the parallel is so striking. And then, of course, Rush is now the angry American. The angry American. And that’s where they are. They are so out of touch, just like Hitler was out of touch. But he was mesmerizing. So, I think it was comical. I think there are parallels drawn by some of the things Hitler was saying and some of the things that were at the CPAC convention. They are not Americans. They don’t care about the greater good of society.”
— Ed Schultz, The Ed Schultz Show, March 2, 2009. [MP3 audio]

Dick Cheney Is a Nazi

“You know, I listen to this monster, and all I see is underneath his suit, I see the SS uniform. And if he were to open up his collar, there would be the death’s head.”
— Mike Malloy referring to Dick Cheney on the January 7, 2009 Mike Malloy Show. [MP3 audio]

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